The Final Goodbye..

My heart is crying aloud ,my love ;my support ;my alternate existence - MY BCL is on its final countdown .After 8 days..this library which is a support system of many will be no more.Words really escape me at this moment ,when I see my library detoriating day by day.

A week back, the DVD collection of movies had been packed to be sent back to the United Kingdom .Also, today was the last day of returning the issued books to the library.I did so, rightaway. I understood one thing in the entire thing, "there are different people in this world ,they can never think similar ,if u force them to do something ,in return they will punch you back." I met some friends in the bcl ,who asked me if I am returning the books or keeping them with me forever. Frankly speaking, the vary idea disgustes me even to think like that about a holy place like this. How can you steal a book and then expect ,it will give you knowledge? They being my friends I could'nt say mor to them but it just shows me disrespect towards the books and library.

I've been frequently visiting the library , but as the days are coming closer a fear really hits me and tears remain in my eyes. Yesterday , I came in the library by daytime ,sat there to read the books.Almost, all the books were back to shelf.I started of with Fiction Section.As I went through the books of various authors like Jeffery Archer (entire collection) ,John Grisham(all 11 books) ,Agatha Christie (Helluva of books) ,Rudyard Kipling ,George Orwell's Contolia ,Princess Diana's Biography et al , The Royal Monarch collection, Salman Rushdie's controversial +others! ,one of the Amitav Ghosh ,Anita Nair, Jhumpa Lahiri ,Arundhati Roy,Sudha Murthy,Mark Tully ,my love Khushwant Singh...how can I forget him! And, all such others. They happened to talk to me.I felt the mystic power .As if they are bidding me a farewell..I was at six and seven.Confused, frustrated,sad and helpless.

Today, when I entered the library.The guard outside gave me a strange look.I got puzzled.As I entered ,many members were gathered near a shelf.It was a final withdrawn sale.People were busy collecting the best books at best price.I did'nt liked the greediness ,for the first time.So, I shifted to some other section and finally wanted to write a post for my love,bcl.

One thing that has struck my mind and moreover put me in a dilemna is the 'Refund Policy'.The BCL has a policy that ,all the existing members will get refund of their membership till their membership cards validity. So, you go either ways.Some who will get less money will take away books worth Rs.1000 + and those who are sincere and generous enough to return the books will do so and attain a sum from the library A/c. My case is bit critical. I wanted to return the books,so I did. Secondly, I don't want to take the money from the library butmy financial situation is worse these days , am out of balance.My family and friends are aware about the refund policy ,so they are also relying on me and thus not ready to provide me any financial help.And, this sucks! I've not yet applied for refund and I am making my mind to stayback..again,depends.

I am feeling very bad,that is all I can say at this moment.I really don't know ,what will be my life after bcl closure.I tried my best on my level to save the library.Slogans, Protest,Media help,Meeting the C.M and the buearocrats who told us something will happen.Recently, a question was raised in the State Legislative Assembly ,regarding the closure of bcl. The library is going to shutdown,thats sure being a global policy.The solution is, state govt. will bring up the same type of library under the Sanskriti Vibhag of M.P .Frankly speaking, I don't believe in the govt. tag! Lets see. what happens..